Do You Believe In Love Before First Sight?

Do You Believe In Love Before First Sight?

It was indicated on the front page of Reader’s Digest, a monthly magazine, Issue-I-Can’t-Remember-Anymore. The manticore of the said article is quite catchy; it’s the exact counter part of the jargon, “Do You Believe in Love at First Sight?”

In today’s generation, this is the so-so of the most. What do I mean?

There are several encounters that embrace the said conspiracy, to put it in black and white. People who lives and think on the verge of the 21^st century is well-aware of how widespread this scenario really is.

So what in the world of blogosphere is that love (before first sight?) relationship or something am I talking about? For those of you my dear readers who wasn’t used reading an article of someone as unusual as the author of this post, then let me teach you how.

You are, of course very familiar with “Long-Distance Relationship” and I’m pretty sure that you ‘re aware that this do not only covers those situation which all LDR’s supposed to be (and there’s a rule about going on LDR now?).

The Norm of the Past:

Guy goes abroad and girl stays behind. They love each other. They communicate with each other through all means of communication, 24/7. If there’s a will, then there’s a way.

The Now of the Present:

Guy’s on the North hemisphere and girl’s on the South Pole (ok, she’s not a polar bear or anything. Pretend, pretend!)

They love each other. They communicate with each other through all means of communication, 24/7. If there’s a will, then there’s a way. And—there’s more! They decided to meet at the equator. The center of it all!

And there’s super nothing wrong with that, is there?! I can’t find any flaw to put beside LDR’s name. It just makes me wonder how two people get along so quickly and so intimately together though they haven’t met completely, mind you, not even once! Love is pretty amazing. It’s some kind of a supernatural phenomenon to be considered. It’s something that even when the world’s greatest scientist tries to explain , there would still be someone who will contradict, opposite to his Theory of Relativity, who not a soul will be going object.

So Do You Believe In Love Before First Sight?

A True Story of Love Before First Sight

This is a true story. I am the leading lady and he is my leading man. It does not end here! Well… I think it would not end here. I suppose it is not really ending here. Ok, so what do you think, does it really ends here?

What ends where?

Inside the mediocre chatroom, I made myself at home as possible. It is one of the most popular and one of the most loaded chatroom in a very popular chat service program that I can name (for it’s alias of course!) Yahoo Messenger. I’m getting bored with the things I’m always used to type with the details I’m forced to give, over and over again. “Ruby, 14, F, LPC” Yeah right! The NASL that stands for Name, Age, Sex and Location. Then, all of a sudden there’s a small box that appeared in my monitor that caught my entire attention. “Anung name niyo po?” And for the first time, I got a PM (Private Message) from a total stranger that is NASL free.

I was moved. And he, Michael, as he introduced himself to me is very courteous. He seems to be someone that won’t do anything to anybody. He is a basketball varsity player from an elite university. He is studying Civil Engineering at that time. The conflict was, he is six years older than me. And now, everytime we chat, it’s always on my mind to think that if ever I’ll fall in love with him, will age really doesn’t matter?

Ok so I guess it wouldn’t. He courted me. It was on my birthday that I’d decided, instead of receiving a gift from someone, it’s better to give someone a gift. A gift that I would not just be buying on some store I will pass by. A gift that—in fact cannot be bought. I said… yes.

Then not so long after he and I got together, without really being “together” problems, different kind of problems rushed in. There’s someone who claimed to be his GF, who seems to be like a total terrorist, there’s this “Sorry, I cannot be with you in this hour, I have someone to be with kasi eh, classmate ko sa Theology. Ingatz Mahal” Then the worst part: ” I’ll be going to the States for an operation. I have lung cancer” Then her ate started chatting with me and keeping me posted of how he was doing. I couldn’t believe it. I know it’s not true. I cannot believe it, nor accept the fact that Faye, his older sister, one day told me that “Michael is no one but a corpse now. Don’t be shocked.”

Too late. I am already been!

As a matter of fact I do not know if it’s just a set-up or what. I don’t know a thing. I can't absorb what the situation is trying to tell me. He can just- they could just make it all up! But one thing’s sure, I am not that wise enough to know how a nineteen-year old man could be that serious with a mere fourteen year-old girl.

Now, put the blame on me.

Missing's Cool

It's been almost two weeks now since I left my old school. Since I were a sophomore student. Since I was free of all the burdens condemened into my already bulging shoulders. Since I laugh. Since I laugh the laugh of happiness only a good, heartfelt feeling surrounded with clssmates, friends and teachers can bring.



Missing school is pathetic. No, no, no! I don't mean, my school's pathetic, what I mean is that, it's really weird and ridiculous to be feeling this way. Last time that I can remember myself is while I am sitting in one of the classroom's grafitti-covered, brown-painted wooden arm chair. I was thinking so loudly. Yes thinking so loudly, getting bored and being a couch potato, I wondered when school will end as I rummaged through one of my envelopes looking for a lost test paper at the same time and, wondering, maybe, just maybe when in this- the heck, year all my 'sufferings' will cease penetrating my young, young dear life.

I couldn't do anything. I talk in the mirror, not long enough, i'll shriek, and shriek loud enough for the alley cats behind our streets to move into another hideout and, never come back for the rest of their nine whole lives.

"I'm ugly, I have wrinkles and I look older than my thirty-seven year old mother, I am haggard and don't you touch my shoulder, it's swelling from my big, stupid bag!"

I am shouting, shouting so loud. In fact, inside my mind, I screamed all my lamentations, my regrets and all the things that bothers me. And I'm not that foolish to wake every sleeping soul in the neighborhood at midnight while editing our team's website and solving for algebra, while surfing the net for Nick Vujicic's life without limbs something. Yes, I do scream, scream inside of my already-distorted-just-one-more-and-it's-dilapidated mind.


And as I reminisce about this funny scenario, this one silly part of my whole journey being a teenager, being a student, I couldn't help to smile.


There is this happening, it's still freshly painted on almost 100% of my brain. It was the last day of the school year, my dear sophomore school year. We have merely, a short period to stay together, for the last time, the whole class of St. Therese of the Child Jesus

Morning. The old capiz window is catching the early rays of the golden sun, all of a sudden we noticed something unfamiliar. At the back, on our cleaner/birthday announcement bulletin board, all the data was erased and, written in an ordinary chalk :

"EVERY END IS ALSO A BEGGINING."

As far as I know, nobody found out who wrote it. It's just it.


That's why it's pathetic. Didn't I just say I'm missing school? And would you mind to look your last in its title?

The Kuya I Never Had, Will Never Would

I'm fond of having somebody much older than I am. Some people whom I've shared this little runting of mine, most often than not always tell me that they prefer not having a kuya (with those who have, yes.) Oftentimes, they scold me for being so uncontented, impulsive and choosy. They always tell me, "Wait 'till you have one, if you will still have, haha, and you'll realize how wrong you were"

Maybe i'm really was not that right being so uncontent. But I really want to have a big brother of my own, someone to make kalamansi juices with after an one-on-one basketball game where the winner would be me, somebody who will tease me to the last whom I will end up pillow fighting with, someone who will play the part of the big boss when facing those guys who were thrashing, hmm, just thrashing right,

... just even to have someone whom I will call, My Kuya.

Just like, "my kuya said so..." "I'll ask my kuya" or "Ayaw kasi ni kuya eh"

It's pretty amazing. People are people. They are always looking for something more, someone more.

Just like yours trully, simplify: me!

I will blame myself and start runting here and there for there's nothing, for God's sake, there's nothing in this vast world that I can do in order to have a kuya of my own. To top things of I am the eldest of the two siblings, me and my bratty (oops?) sister. Period.

If only I can write my past, my entire life story, then I will add a character called a kuya. And to a character named Ruby, I will give him as a present. Hihi!

Crossing the Crossroads

Crossing the Crossroads, eh? What could my crossroads be? And literally, what is a crossroad?


crossroad: an intersecting path from a different direction meeting at a one particular place. From an old, moth-eaten dictionary, I was able to find this plain definition but, unfortunately, was not able to satisfy my cravings of the exact meaning of the word. I have rummaged the internet for the relief of having to stupefy my burning curiosity but was not, after all that succesful

If you're gonna ask me why I'm so particular with the word, the good-for-nothing-conscience-dealing-I-don't-think-it-exist-and-I-don't-care-about-it-word, i'll simplify.

Just as when I tried to be someone else more than myself and ended up being somebody as stupid as I'm already are, just as when I tried my best to decide; whom to love and whom to hurt, just as when I asked myself whom to prioritize more between my loving family and my hateful, rebellious self. Just as just. I chose to submerge myself in the cold waters of having to deal with decisions and finally breath into it without using my earthly lungs.


On being a sophomore, soon to be a junior highschool student, I know that there are really so much haggles, trials, blackmails (including the pass-this-text-message-to-20-people-or-some- bloody-girl-will-appear-on-your-cupboard-tonight) to face, fight and conquer. And if you'll watch my words closely, they literally mean the same, I used all of them to emphasize how much effort I have to exert in order to win over the stupid battle, and how even an extreme word will not do in the bloody tempest.


So much so far. This is my first post in this blog and most of you my dear readers, (if it happened to be that some unlucky soul passed by my blog, however.) believe in first impressions. I do not want you to think that all I can do with life, it's challenges and twists is to lament. And to babble about how some unlucky girl happened to pass by its road. I wanted to announce to everybody that you are not alone in fighting life's battle, you're not the only one who faces struggle and that, of all things you must do, shall consider yourself, lucky.

Welcome to my world. I do apologize for being sarcastic, egolitical and melancholic. Help me choose my crossroad,be a part of how I live it and if you happened to have a good definition for this crossroad thing, do inform me. Please feel free to ask me questions, send your negative reactions or just say that you happened to pass by my page, (and now belongs to the unlucky ones?) Kidding! What do you think, maybe you're not so unlucky, after all?